Just to show the ladies of the forum that I can take it as well as dish it!...........
Best Man Hating One Liners
Q: What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground?
A. Shoot him again.
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Q: How can you tell when a man is well hung?
A: When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.
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Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
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Q: How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A1: One -- he just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.
A2: Three -- one to screw in the bulb and two to listen to him brag about the screwing part.
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Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy.
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Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
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Q: Why does it take 100,000,000 sperm to fertilize one egg?
A: Because not one will stop and ask directions.
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Q: Why do female black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
A: To stop the snoring before it starts.
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Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: It helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
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Q: What is the difference between men and women?
A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.
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Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals".
