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Paula


May you have enough happiness to make you sweet,
enough trials to make you strong,
enough sorrow to keep you human and
enough hope to make you happy.


Joined: Apr 30, 2004
Points: 785

How men and dogs are the same...
Original Message   Feb 21, 2005 8:37 pm
1. Both take up too much space on the bed.
2. Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaning.
3. Both mark their territory.
4. Neither tells you what's bothering them.
5. The smaller ones tend to be more nervous.
6. Both have an inordinate fascination with women's crotches.
7. Neither does any dishes.
8. Both fart shamelessly.
9. Neither of them notice when you get your hair cut.
10. Both like dominance games.
11. Both are suspicious of the postman.
12. Neither understands what you see in cats.
Replies: 1 - 7 of 7View as Outline
MissSnowshoveler


If you don't have free speech, what do you have?

Location: NS
Joined: Feb 5, 2005
Points: 706

Re: How men and dogs are the same...
Reply #1   Feb 22, 2005 6:55 pm
This is also very true.  Although my 7 year old german shepard/husky mix will wash the dishes given the chance.

Sherri

If you don't have free speech, what do you have?
Highwind


Despite the high cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular.

Joined: Jan 13, 2004
Points: 985

Re: How men and dogs are the same...
Reply #2   Feb 22, 2005 10:21 pm
Ladies, ladies, ladies:

The proper expression in common usage is that "dog is man's best friend" not that they are the same. Granted I believe the expression truly means man in the sense of mankind, which encompasses both male and female genders.

However, man's best friend is usually his fellow man when it comes down to certain situations:

1. you and a buddy are in a clothing optional ballet establishment and it is a few days to payday and you are short a few dollars to buy beer and another lap dance...well, your good friend will lend you the money as he knows you are good to pay him back.  A dog can't do that; and

2. you stagger home at 2 am after being at the "ballet" only to find your spouse/significant other there ready to ream your ear out with another endless lecture on relationships. Well your good buddy will swear on a stack of Molson cases that you and he were not at the bar, but had to work late on an important deadline, and feeling a bit famished, ordered out for some beer and pizza, to replenish the electrolytes and thus continue working at a rapid pace so you could get home to that special lady in your life at 2 am rather than 4am. Thusly you've saved her 2 hours of lost sleep, being the considerate person you obviously are. Your dog would just look up at you with big brown eyes.

This message was modified Feb 22, 2005 by Highwind


Honda stable: HS 724 snowblower;  HRS216 lawnmower; BF2 UWWW; 5 HP, 2200 psi/2.9 GPM pressure washer.

Electric: BV2500 B&D Leaf Hog/snow duster; old 12" Weedeater.

Paula


May you have enough happiness to make you sweet,
enough trials to make you strong,
enough sorrow to keep you human and
enough hope to make you happy.


Joined: Apr 30, 2004
Points: 785

Re: How men and dogs are the same...
Reply #3   Feb 23, 2005 1:29 am
Sherri

My Boxer is better than men in that she offers to clean the dishes every chance she gets without grumbling or thinking that we need to 'trade favors'...

Highwind

I do believe this is several times now that you have mentioned "clothing optional ballet" in posts but since I am such a good friend, I am not going to inquire as to why it is you enjoy going to see dancing naked men . ...(thats really none of my business, after all...)

And the reasons dogs look at you with big brown eyes is because they are wondering why YOUR eyes are getting browner by the second...since they generally are pretty good about doing their "business" outside on a regular basis, they don't understand a species that would be FULL of "outside business" (and getting fuller by the second).

Paula

Marshall


As Long As There Are Tests, There Will Be Prayer In Public Schools. ;- )

Joined: Sep 16, 2002
Points: 7730

Re: How men and dogs are the same...
Reply #4   Feb 23, 2005 11:55 am
#13, Both hump your leg.
MissSnowshoveler


If you don't have free speech, what do you have?

Location: NS
Joined: Feb 5, 2005
Points: 706

Re: How men and dogs are the same...
Reply #5   Feb 23, 2005 5:58 pm
Marshall wrote:
#13, Both hump your leg.


OMG how true you are!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you don't have free speech, what do you have?
Paula


May you have enough happiness to make you sweet,
enough trials to make you strong,
enough sorrow to keep you human and
enough hope to make you happy.


Joined: Apr 30, 2004
Points: 785

Re: How men and dogs are the same...
Reply #6   Feb 23, 2005 7:49 pm
Yeah...and neither one seem to understand the word No! 
Highwind


Despite the high cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular.

Joined: Jan 13, 2004
Points: 985

Re: How men and dogs are the same...
Reply #7   Feb 23, 2005 8:03 pm
©Paula wrote:

I do believe this is several times now that you have mentioned "clothing optional ballet" in posts but since I am such a good friend, I am not going to inquire as to why it is you enjoy going to see dancing naked men . ...(thats really none of my business, after all...)

And the reasons dogs look at you with big brown eyes is because they are wondering why YOUR eyes are getting browner by the second...since they generally are pretty good about doing their "business" outside on a regular basis, they don't understand a species that would be FULL of "outside business" (and getting fuller by the second).

Paula


"Sweetheart©" Paula:

Maybe where you live, the COB is performed by men, but let me assure you that here we adhere to traditional male values, and our “ballerinas” are most definitely female. That fact is very obvious towards the end of their performances, and especially the last act of the show.

 

I am such a strong believer in traditional values that every year for International Women’s Day, I get a group of fellow male workers together to toast the important role that women with great bodies play in our society by attending an all female ballet production at the COB, whether it be “Phantom of the Last G-string”, “Anna Karenina Reveals All”, or “Swan Lake Uncovered”.

 

 

And my eyes are naturally brown, thank you.

 

Marshall,

 

Man always strives to attain higher glory than that.


© Buttlint Enterprises {'lint your royalty cheque is in the mail for using your copyright, so call off the lawyers!}

This message was modified Feb 23, 2005 by Highwind


Honda stable: HS 724 snowblower;  HRS216 lawnmower; BF2 UWWW; 5 HP, 2200 psi/2.9 GPM pressure washer.

Electric: BV2500 B&D Leaf Hog/snow duster; old 12" Weedeater.

Replies: 1 - 7 of 7View as Outline
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